Thursday, May 11, 2006
Nursery Blues
Okay, so I haven't had a job in the church for a few months now since I was released as the Primary Secretary. They kept me on the primary board, but had not given me anything else to do and consequently I wasn't available to go anywhere else. It has been very nice being able to go to Relief Society, which I've felt I had really needed. The other day, I was asked to be in Nursery considering I have two children currently in there. I definitely have mixed feelings about this. I want to be where I am needed and am determined to do the best I can. However, that has been the one time during the week I get to escape from my children. I looked forward to Relief Society to be able to be enriched and to have adult discussion. Why is it that they always ask the stay-at-home moms with nursery age children to be in the nursery? It's so hard to be at home with the children with hardly any adult conversation. I love children, but feel like I deserve a break. I also have a hard time with the primary presidency. Having served with them before, I have witnessed how they call someone to positions in the presidency. It is usually who they like, what looks convenient, and, honestly, what would be the easiest. They rarely pray about callings, unless it is an "important" one. This was something that I had struggled with when I was in the primary presidency. I have always felt the all callings are important, especially ones that deal with the children. Knowing what I have seen and how they call people to these jobs makes me wonder about how I was called to do this. Was it merely out of convenience because of my kids and knowing I wouldn't say no, or was it because that is where the Lord feels I need to be? I guess it doesn't really matter, I will do the best I can and try to be upbeat about it either way. I just wonder. I just worry that they will forget about me in there (as they have a tendency to do with those in nursery) and that I won't be able to look forward to a break from the kids. When the kids are young, is when the break is the most needed and the lessons in Relief Society are so important. The other ladies in there have so much to share with the younger moms. And I have so much to learn. Maybe that's why I'm in nursery. Who knows? I would love to hear any thoughts about this. I am really struggling with this.
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3 comments:
Callings are often really hard to accept. The last two callings I had I kinda threw little tantrums about getting (only alone, of course). And for one of them I even burst into tears. But I accepted and vowed to do the best I could even though I didn't want to.
Surprisingly, I loved both of the callings by the time I was done and cried about leaving them--even after only a few months.
It's hard to when you aren't sure your calling came from God or from someone's after dinner mint idea. If I gave you any advice it would be to make a deal with God. (in the right, humble way, of course!) You promise to do your absolute forever-loving top-of-the-line superhero best with zero murmurings, if He assures you that the calling is from Him and that He won't forget about you, even if everyone else does.
It's the only way I've been able to accept and magnify some of my own callings. And God does mercifully make good on deals like that. :)
I have totally struggled with this too. I love melnel's advice. It's hard for me when I question the way callings are being decided. It does seem that often it's done without much thought or prayer. One thing I've done is (not being in the nursery myself) spoken to our primary president about the nursery callings and mentioned how glad I am not to be in nursery, having two little ones and how hard it must be for those in there who do. She then prayed about it and asked the sisters with young kids how they felt. Good luck and you will always be blessed for serving, no matter what went into the actual calling.
It's really hard to know with callings sometimes. I have one right now I don't like much - teaching adult Sunday School which is really hard when dh is working and my son is crawling around getting into everything. I would just pray about it and do the best you can. He'll give you much help!
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